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Michelle: Wh-what do you mean stolen?

Like you guys just walked over and took it? Like actually breaking and entering!?

Cailin: I don’t know the whole story but I guess so, yeah.

Devin: Well, I stole Pullman’s keys on Friday, so technically there was no breaking or entering.

Michelle: And what are you going to say to him after he realizes the van is missing?

You know teachers get to school way early, right?

Devin: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Michelle: Aaaaauuuggghhhhh!!!

W-we could get in serious trouble! Like even suspended!

I can’t get suspended!

Emma: Chelle! Chelle, don’t worry. If you’re really worried you can get out before we get to the school.

Then no one will ever know you were involved.

Michelle: I’ll have to walk!

Ugh, this is a nightmare.

Devin: Have fun with that.

Michelle: Seriously?

Are you really going to sit there an-

Emma: Hey, how about we talk about something else?

Alright?

Michelle: Hrnnggg… *grumble grumble*

Cailin: Chelle, come on! We’re gonna be on a site where actual puritan witchcraft happened!!

That’s like the coolest thing ever!?

Michelle: Well actually, that’s only an urban legen-

Cailin: That’s as good as confirmed for me!

Michelle: …

Eheh.

So, be honest with me, what do you think we’re going to find today?

Cail: A witch, duh! Maybe even the ghost of a witch! Maybe even two!

I hear witches love this spot!

Chelle: That would be so nice… to finally have some kind of proof…

Our luck hasn’t been that great thus far.…

Cail: You gotta believe, Chelle!

Soon everyone will see we were right about the supernatural!

You still want that, right?

Chelle: I do! We all do!

I mean, that’s why we’re doing this. But we’re just going off of a rumor here.

The likelihood of this  “smoke rising from the graves” story being true isn’t great, and furthermore, the cemetery itself wouldn’t have been-

Cailin: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Michelle: Hey! Just because you like to ignore facts doesn’t mean they aren’t true!

I swear, you need to do more planning and research before we drive to a place at 2 am!

Cail: But that’s what you love to do! How could I take that away from you?

Chelle: I don’t “love” doing it! But nobody else here cares if we waste our time chasing tall tales!

Devin: Heaven forbid we actually just try and have a good time.

Chelle: We’d have a better time if we could convince people we’re not a bunch of madmen.

Devin: Aww, whassamatter? Worried a couple of hurty names are gonna crush your dreams?

Chelle: Like you even have dreams! How about you grow up before you criticize me!

Devin: Oh, I’m perfectly grown. Been a big boy for about a whole year now.

In fact, I just had a growth spurt the other day.

Emma: He’s absolutely talking out of his ass right now. Boy hasn’t grown an inch in two years.

Devin: Hey! I am not! I’ve gotten way taller! I’m almost 5’9”!

Devin: Yo, we’re coming up on Josh’s street. So I’m gonna need everyone to be not lame for like a full minute and get their TP throwing arms ready.

Emma: Said the boy who had borrow money from me to buy the toilet paper.

Cail: You know, how one , uh…

… predicates ammo is not as important as how one…

um…

utilita… tili…

[confused sounds] it…

Michelle:Those were not at all the words you were looking for.

Try: “Procures” and “utilizes”.

Cail: It was on the tip of my tongue!

Michelle: Right…

Devin: It’s okay, Cail, I haven’t slept in over 24 hours.

I don’t know what anything means right now.

Cailin: But you’re driving us…

Michelle: Can we just stay at Josh’s house until the bus comes? Please?

Cailin: I dunno, his mom might literally kill us if we walk in uninvited.

Michelle: *Sigh*

You’re probably right…

Devin: Doesn’t matter, bros. We’re here.

Cailin: Finally!

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